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What We Believe, or What We Feel?

October 24, 2012

“When discussing our deep longings for security in our marriages, we tend to think that we must feel secure in order to function properly. We need to understand that only God’s love ultimately satisfies our deep need for unconditional love, and only following His plans fulfills our need to affect others lastingly. So the issue becomes what we believe rather than what we feel.
“And we sometimes feel that we can love our spouse only if our spouse has fulfilled our need for security and significance. Our love becomes dependent on our spouse’s love for us. This can lead to rejection, manipulation, and fear in our marriage relationships.”

Dr. Larry Crabb, The Marriage Builder, Page 158

Questions for Reflection:
Do you find yourself wanting to feel secure and significant in your relationship before reaching out to care for and love your spouse?
What might be preventing you from finding your security and significance first of all in Christ?
What steps could you take in order to find that security?

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